Novgorod and Piter

So last blog entry was lame. I fear the same will be said of this entry. Um. We rode the elektrickha to Novgorod. So it stopped like every approximately half second in the middle of nowhere so that some drunk man or crazy grandmother could get on or off. There were a lot of both drunk men and crazy grandmothers on the elektrichka. One of the crazy grandmothers talked to Susanna. She was crazy. Another of the grandmothers decided she needed to call every single person whose phone number she had and wish them a happy new years in a VERY LOUD VOICE! So then we got to Novgorod. And found our hotel. And I went to buy us water. And I walked past the shaslik cafe which had a disco ball and lots of drunk dancing occurring. I also walked past a store called “The World of Belarusian Cosmetics.” Then on Friday we went and wandered around the Kremlin which is very old and stately and majestic. And there was lots of wind blowing and snow whirling and cold ness occuring. It was pretty cool. Then we went in this church thingy. Susanna says it is properly translated as “The Church of the Holy Wisdom.” It was big and old and had lots of icons and stuff. Wow, this is such descript writing I’m doing. I guess if I knew more about art or icons or religion or really any sort of general cultural knowledge it might have more of an impact on me. But anyways. I don’t know anything about these things.

Then we went to a museum. And Susanna got yelled at for having her nose too close to the display case. This is the most brilliant thing ever. We were just generally frowned at by lots of grandmother/guard women. There was an icon section of the museum. Oh man. I am tired of icons. So I sort of looked at some of them. I also made myself read all of the explanations in Russian so that it would take longer. I also strategically placed myself so that the grandmother/guard women could not see both Susanna and I at the same time. Which caused them to freak out and do their absolute best to reposition themselves so they could see us at the same time or else do some secret code signal thing so that another nearby grandmother/guard women would move her position to be able to watch me and then the first one could concentrate on keeping Susanna at a safe distance from the display cases. Then we went to another church. And we crossed the footbridge over the river in a huge whirling snow storm and it was awesome. And the other church was very old and deserted and had the only remaining icons/paintings/artwork of Theophanes the Greek (Woohoo! I know something!) Anyways. I liked it better. Because it wasn’t trying hard. And it wasn’t full of people. Actually Susanna and I were the only ones there.

Then we tried to find a cafe. Except one cafe had only food and no tea. Another had only drinks and no food. A third had both on the menu but then the women told us they didn’t have tea. Hello. We are in Russia. How do you not have tea? Then a fourth had a coat room guy who I saw when I was halfway through the door and so we immediately abandoned that plan. If there is a coat room at the restaurant, that place is way above our budget. Also sometimes at the really fancy places, the coat room man puts your coat on you. Those places are especially expensive. And especially out of our budget guidelines. Anyways we abandoned fourth cafe with coat man. Then fifth cafe which had everything we wanted except then the waitress told us they didn’t have blini. But we were tired of looking. Plus the only other people in the little cafe was a wedding party of like 8 people. And I really wanted to eat in the cafe with the nevesta. I am obsessed with brides now. It is very strange. One time in Moscow at Victory Park there were 6 of them just wandering around near the statue monument thing. It was so awesome. There is a super secret picture of me taken there with like 3 different brides in the background. Also sometimes they have little mini white shuba (fur coats) that are pretty dang cool.

Nothing else important happened in Novgorod. We took the train to Piter on Saturday morning. Found the Crazy Duck Hostel. Which has turned out to be like the CRAZIEST place ever. I could literally write a book about the crazy shit that goes down here. Actually now that I try to write, I’m not sure what to say. We are in a room with 8 beds. At least 3 different people are guaranteed to be sleeping at any given time. Which means the room is always not lit. Which means the level of byez poryadok (mess) is completely ridiculous. Like at any given time people are sleeping. It is RIDICULOUS. There are people from Finland who sleep all day and party all night. Except the one snores. Like REALLY loud. Like it is impossible to sleep. IMPOSSIBLE. So you just have to hope that you have gotten enough sleep while he has been out partying and so when he returns at like 8 a.m. and begins to snore it will be okay that it is impossible for you to sleep. Also there are people from Brazil. The boy is ALWAYS in bed. Or in the hostel. I’m not sure if he ever really leaves the hostel. Like seriously. Also there are Ukrainians who are very, very nice and know way more about America then Susanna and I combined. I don’t have a favorite NBA team. I don’t know anything about Sequois National Park. I know little about Mexican immigrants in California. Who is my favorite American actor? I don’t know. Not Tom Cruise. What is my favorite band? Is Nirvana popular in America? What about The Doors? Sometimes we try to ask questions about Ukraine, but I don’t really know enough to form any sort of intelligent question. But they really are very, very nice. Then there are also a large number of completely out of control Australians who are not staying in our room but they just sort of take over the kitchen/rest of the hostel. They are I would say very drunk very a lot of the time. They’re just complete loons. This paragraph has very inadequately conveyed the insanity of this hostel. There are also some other people. The Australians think they are French. I think they are Russian. So we’re not really sure.

In Piter we have...
-wandered around for a long time in the rainy muck looking for internet and grocery stores.
-gone to the Russian Museum which was very big and stately and majestic and full of priceless cultural art masterpieces which I know nothing about. But the palace it is housed in was pretty awesome. Actually I spent most of the time looking at the ceililngs in the different rooms. The rest of the people really were missing out by focusing on the actual art and not the awesome gold ceiling. One of the rooms had really pretty red walls and then the gold ceiling stuff. Also my general rule for appreciation of art is the bigger it is, the better it is. This is a very incorrect appreciation. After all, the small art requires fine hand control and delicate brush technique. But the big art is where it’s at. Go big or go home.
-went to one of the neighboring palaces with the 3 Ukrainians and wandered the grounds for a really long time.
-stood on Nevski Prospekt and listened to Putin’s New Year’s address to the country and was surrounded by like 8 trillion people and fireworks and lots of hooligan-ness. I would say без слов. It was pretty great.
-Today we found the Chijik Pijik statue. And wandered more about Nevskii. And saw the rink on Palace Square. And ate blini.

And tomorrow I think we are going to the Hermitage to further my art education and deep insights about brush technique. And maybe the PeterPaul fortress thingy. And then on Thursday we are leaving for Helsinki. The Finn man (in like the one time in which we were both awake at the same time) told us it is a very expensive city. Woot Woot!

Also Dimitri Medvedev is 5 foot 4. This is very funny. You should laugh.